Bad times in School

I was bullied at school for looking different, my head is big. I was picked on and called names every day and just humiliated constantly. I was called ‘big head’, I was never called by my name. There was a group of older boys who were the main bullies, they would do all sorts of things every single day, I never had a day off the bullying in all my years at school until they left and I went into the final year. There were so many things that they did, slapping me on the head on the school bus, shouting insults like ‘how does he hold his head up it must be so heavy?’, and hitting me all the time for no reason. There were so many cruel moments and I had no dignity and lived in fear. I remember we had to learn to play the Recorder at School and we had communal shared Recorders, and each week my bullies were in the session before my class and would order me to use one of their Recorders, and it would always smell and be deliberately full of spit, and they threatened to beat me up if I wiped it before using it, so I had to put up with all their germs. I dreaded it but was so terrified of them that I just would follow orders and put it straight in my mouth, I would have tears welling up in my eyes when I was playing it. Another time I was walking with a friend and one of them spat their bubble gum into my mouth. And another time I was dragged by the hood of my coat across the playground. It’s horrible because it still affects me today, years later, and I have lasting confidence issues and no happy memories from School. I never told a Teacher and even though I was frequently insulted infront of Teachers, they did nothing to help me!